


Of Secrets Kept

by Maitimiel



Category: TOLKIEN J. R. R. - Works & Related Fandoms, The Silmarillion and other histories of Middle-Earth - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Ambiguous Relationships, Casual Relationship, M/M, Sexual Frustration, They don't really know what they are doing, Watersports, not actually that explicit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-06
Updated: 2016-08-06
Packaged: 2018-07-28 07:26:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,835
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7630654
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maitimiel/pseuds/Maitimiel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Finrod and Maedhros take a break from the chase.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Of Secrets Kept

**Author's Note:**

  * For [amyfortuna](https://archiveofourown.org/users/amyfortuna/gifts).



"No, keep your clothes on."

Maedhros stopped his hands on the laces of his pants and looked down at his cousin with surprise and a little disappointment.

"I thought you wanted to do this," he said, bending to plant a hot kiss on Finrod's throat, "did I misunderstand something?"

"No," his golden cousin said, breathless, waving his fingers into Maedhros hair and pulling him down for a kiss, all the while rubbing himself on Maedhros thighs, showing how eager he was to continue, "But stay dressed. It turns me on."

"Oh," he said, and then got distracted by the things Finrod's tongue were doing on his neck. Maedhros wasn't sure he had touched his cousin's hair before, but if he had, he had certainly forgotten how soft if felt; he wrapped it around his fist and pulled lightly to make Finrod look into his eyes. His cousin smiled brilliantly at him before pulling Maedhros neckline down to expose a nipple and immediately taking it into his mouth.

"You got us stark naked on the theater the other day." Maedhros started to move towards Finrod's neat desk, an arm around his waist to pull Finrod with him.

"What can I say, theaters bring out the performer in me." Finrod fell to his knees and pulled Maedhros pants down just enough to free his erection.

Maedhros propped himself on the edge of the desk, closing his eyes in pleasure when a hot mouth engulfed him, toying with his cousin's hair. "Anyone could have walked in."

Finrod drew back and Maedhros quickly opened his eyes to look at him. He had a very amused smile, his eyes sparkling as he lazily licked his own swollen lips. "Would you like to talk about that?"

With a strangled groan, he held Finrod more firmly by the hair and pushed back into his mouth. Finrod eagerly complied, with a muffled sentence that sounded much like "Didn't think so."

Maedhros trip to Alqualondë wasn't turning out to be half bad.

_-_-_-_

"Makalaure is already way ahead of us, you know?" Finrod asked when Maedhros started to slow down his horse, "We're gonna lose the deer."

"Kano has a small army of both men and hounds to catch this deer for him," Maedhros said, not stopping entirely but not hurrying either, "He's been tracking that beast for weeks, he's not about to lose it cause I stopped to take a piss."

Finrod slowed down his horse to keep the same pace as his cousin, looking amused. "Since when does he care that much for hunting anyway?"

"Since he can no longer impress the noble or seduce pretty things in our grandfather's court with his lovely voice." Maedhros started to look very uncomfortable as he looked around for some place more private than the open field. Finrod looked around and pointed to the same woods the stag was leading the hunting party to, only a little more south.

"Does chasing deer give him the same pleasure of chasing girls? Who would have thought."

"Shut up." Maedhros came down from his horse gracelessly once they were under the cover of the trees, and let it loose as he walked deeper into the woods. "He's got a lot on his mind. We all do."

Finrod came down much more swiftly, looking as regal as always even as he was covered in sweat, with his hair out of place. He followed closely after Maedhros. "Wouldn't I know it? But at least our siege is holding, and I haven't had too much trouble for the last several decades. Have you?"

Maedhros didn't answer. He circled around a bit until they reached a clearing. He threw a look at his cousin before unlacing his pants and turning to the general direction of a large tree.

But before he could relieve himself, Finrod surged behind him, wrapping one arm around Maedhros waist and using his other hand to cup Maedhros cock, making his cousin jump. "What are you doing?!" He asked bewildered, trying to pull away. Finrod held tight.

"Getting close," he said casually.

"I really need to piss, Findarato!"

"I know," Maedhros couldn't really see Finrod's face from this angle, but he could _hear_ the teasing smile on his cousin's face. "Go ahead," he said, breathing in Maedhros scent, face buried between his shoulder blades.

"I'm not gonna piss on your hand! Don't be an idiot, Ingo." He said urgently, his bladder achingly full. He tried to move again, but Finrod's arm around him made it very difficult to do so without wetting himself. "Let go!"

"Why?" he challenged, brusquely letting go of Maedhros only to turn him around and pushing him against the tree. He pressed on him with his whole body now, face inches apart. "Do you truly want me too? Do you?"

His voice was harsher than usual, but still soft enough that it was clear he meant his words: Maedhros needed only say so, he would back off.

His next words were low and strangled. "Findarato, I can't hold it any longer."

Findarato softened his tone some. "Then don't." He released Maedhros arms, bracing himself on the rough bark behind them, his eyes intently on Maedhros face, his hip still pressing him. "Trust me, Maitimo."

Maedhros looked at him, at his clear, familiar eyes, his own inquiring and vulnerable. He raised a hand to touch Finrod's cheek. After an endless pause that couldn't have lasted more than a few seconds, he let go and let his release wet them both. He never stopped looking at Finrod's face, and his cousin didn't move either, except to caress Maedhros stiff shoulders softly, until Maedhros visibly relaxed and leaned onto him.

They eventually collapsed to the floor of the forest, Maedhros back to the tree, Finrod sitting between his legs, his eyes finally closed. Maedhros raked his fingers through Finrod's hair, unsure of himself. He took a very deep breath before asking, "Does this turn you on too?"

"You should know by now." Finrod kept his eyes closed, but settled himself more comfortably, a hand coming to rest on Maedhros chest.

"Know what?"

"It's you." He said simply. "You turn me on. Any wich way."

Maedhros pondered this for a while. "Nah. You're into far too strange things for it to be just me."

Finrod was not fussed. "Believe what you want." He opened his eyes, his hand moving suggestively from Maedhros chest to his waist. "Do you think your brother caught that thing yet?"

"We didn't have to come, if hunting bores you so." Maedhros touched Finrod's knee in a pretense of nonchalance. "We could have provided other entertainments."

"Oh, I like hunting fine. But we've been chasing this particular deer for what, a week? At this point, I almost feel like it has earned it's right to live." He half turned, lips planting a very light kiss to Maedhros collarbone as he half turned in place, sliding Maedhros shirt up to touch the skin beneath.

"I don't think I can do that anymore," Maedhros said, grimly, looking pointedly at a colorful mushroom sprouting from a mossy tree trunk behind Finrod.

"That's what I'm talking about, I'm just so tired of..."

"No," Maedhros interrupted.

"No?" Finrod opened his eyes, bemused, and followed Maedhros eyes to the mushroom before looking at his face, "What do you mean?"

"I mean," Maedhros voice was clear, and he didn't blush, but he still didn't look at Finrod, "I can't share with you what we once shared. Physically."

"Oh," Finrod's hand stilled immediately, and he pulled it back slowly, "It's all right, I understand..." 

"No you don't," Maedhros said sharply, "You can't understand it, Findarato, you weren't there."

"I can't understand it," Finrod agreed calmly, "Not like that, you're right. But I can," he choose his next words very carefully, "accept who you have become even without fully understanding how it happened. I can love you regardless."

"That's _nice_ " Maedhros tone wasn't nice at all, "But without the physical aspect of our relationship, I don't know that there is much left."

"Now you're just being cruel," Finrod's tone was clipped, "That's hardly all we were. We have always looked after each other."

"You mean you have looked after me," bitterness tinged Maedhros voice, and he bit his lips hard, "I pretty much left you hanging, if I remember correctly."

Finrod crossed his arms, trying to keep his own temper under control. "So you did. Get over it, Maitimo. I have."

"Have you? How?" Maedhros tried to keep the desperation out of his tone, with little success, "I know I couldn't."

"Well, we have agreed that we don't really understand each other, haven't we?" Finrod released his breath, trying to deflect the argument before it got too heated. "Maybe we should leave it at that."

"You are far too good at getting over things," Maedhros voice had lost some of its sharpness, leaving emptiness in its place.

"I've had a lifetime of practice. We haven't met in such a long time. Let's leave the bitterness for when we are apart again, shall we?"

Maedhros closed his eyes, before saying brokenly "I'm sorry. But this is a part of it, too. I can't go back. I don't know if I can _be _with you, like _that_. Maybe one day, but..."__

__Finrod shook his head. "We don't have to go back. I don't know if I could either. But we can enjoy whatever we have now."_ _

__"I don't know what we have now. What we could have."_ _

__"Then I'll wait until you know. We don't have to rush. We have time." He leaned again against Maedhros chest, playing distractedly with his hair. "One day we'll know."_ _

__For all Maedhros couldn't say, he wrapped his arms around Finrod tightly and buried his face is his cousin's golden hair. Finrod kissed him more chastely, before settling himself down again._ _

__"You stink," He said after a while, not raising his head._ _

__"Huh. Whose fault is that?"_ _

__"I'm not gonna dignify that with an answer." Maedhros breathed in more of Finrod's scent._ _

__"I don't really mind stinking of you," Finrod said casually, picking up the colorful mushroom and bringing it closer to the eye._ _

__"Don't eat that. People might notice. Do we expect them to believe we both pissed ourselves and still couldn't keep up with the party?"_ _

__"I wasn't going to _eat_ it. And we don't expect them to believe anything, cause I'm sure not offering any explanations. Besides," he fumbled around his pockets, "I think we both stank enough before that nobody shall know any better." Finrod made a happy sound when he managed to fish a small notebook from his robes and, propping it on a knee, started to sketch the fat fungus._ _

__Maedhros rested his chin on Finrod's shoulder, watching him draw with fondness and fascination. "Guess we won't be running after deer so soon, then."_ _

__Finrod's eyes sparkled in his direction and he smiled, before returning his attentions to the paper._ _

__"We'll have time."_ _

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! So, I hope you liked this. I never wrote any sort of watersports before, but when I read your letter, I wanted to give it a try. I hope it's not terrible.


End file.
